I have been feeling really down ever since I came back to Sydney two weeks ago. The hectic work week immediately following my arrival distracted me a bit as I was mostly overcome by exhaustion to think about anything else. As I settled back into a steady work routine the past one week after my Boss left Sydney, the full impact of homesickness hit.
Other than work, I have not been motivated to do anything at all. I have dreams of Singapore, of people I miss and of Pulau Ubin. I don't have much appetite and only eat when I get really hungry or I will faint, and this led to some rather bad gastric pains earlier in the week that I had to take a day off. I hole myself up in my little room all the time just watching DVDs but half the time I'm not really focusing on the shows. I think up all possible ways to make my life in Sydney happier such as getting myself a car so I can get around more besides hiding in my room, getting a pet for companionship, signing up for some kind of photography workshop and brushing up on my photo editing skills because these are things I enjoy doing, making more new friends etc. But I get frustrated because there are a lot of constraints especially on the financial front and then I start thinking of all the other problems I have and start hating me for inflicting the frustration onto myself. It then becomes a downward spiral of no return into depression.
I am not a whiner. Nor am I one to wallow in self pity for extended periods of time. But this time I am taking a longer than usual time to pick myself up and I wonder why. I think I am badly in need of some encouragement.
feeling down
国境之南 (海角七号)
如果海會說話 如果風愛上砂
如果 有些想念遺忘在某個長假
我會聆聽浪花 讓風吹過頭髮
任記憶裡的愛情在時間潮汐裡喧嘩
非得等春天遠了夏天才近了
我是在回首時終於懂得 (也許天氣永遠會那麼熱)
當陽光再次回到那 飄著雨的國境之南
我會試著把那一年的故事 再接下去說完
當陽光再次離開那 太晴朗的國境之南
妳會不會把妳曾帶走的愛 在告別前用微笑全歸還
海很藍 星光燦爛 我仍空著我的臂彎
天很寬 在我獨自唱歌的夜晚
請原諒我的愛 訴說的太緩慢
當陽光再次回到那 飄著雨的國境之南
我會試著把那一年的故事 再接下去說完
當陽光再次離開那 太晴朗的國境之南
妳會不會把妳曾帶走的愛 在告別前用微笑全歸還
tulips in the house
I usually get some flowers to liven up the house when I go on my weekly grocery shopping trips. So far, I've mostly gotten gerberas and the occasional sunflower. This week, I came across a very lovely bunch of 10 pink tulips at Coles Supermarket and couldn't resist making the purchase. I placed a stalk in my bedroom and left the other nine in the walkway leading from the main door to the living room. Even Becky commented they look pretty. I just hope they last as long as the gerberas do.
blood
This sight greeted me in my bathroom mirror when I woke up today. After wiping the blood off, I could not find the source of the bleeding at all. I did not feel any pain too. It was very strange. I did however, enjoy the taste of that fresh red blood. Remember I mentioned before that I miss having ulcers because I miss biting them so I could taste the salty blood in my mouth? I kinda wish this bleeding thing can happen on a more regular basis in replacement of those ulcers that I never seem to get. LOL.
I took this picture and showed it to the girls at work. In trying to solve the mystery of this bleeding incident, several theories have been offered:
Eliss suggests I could have been gnashing my teeth in my sleep and bit my mouth/lips accidentally. She also thinks since there was no wound nor pain, maybe it was a trick my housemate played on me, to which Becky denied.
Candice reckons it's very cracked lips although she has never seen that much blood from just cracked lips. She thinks I look like a vampire.
Becky thinks I could have been bitten by a spider and may turn into spiderwoman. She also reckons I need to see a psychiatrist as I seem to be going mad.
Stephanie wonders if I transform into a vampire at night and asks to be reminded never to sleep over at my place.
Isobel insists I have turned into a cold blooded vampire.
I think my colleagues are the ones going mad. So what do you think?
scribbled by monkeycrab on Monday, February 23, 2009 8 comments
farewell bbq for karlin
We have an Indonesian colleague who left the company and who'll be going back to Indo for good to assist in her family business. Becky and I were invited to her farewell BBQ party at Pyrmont Point Park.
Contrary to the positive weather forecast, we had storm clouds the whole morning and a drizzle that turned into a shortlived mini downpour the moment we arrived at the BBQ pit. I was chomping down my food in the rain in Becky's blue poncho. I reckon I make the poncho look quite cool. It was quite a funny sight watching all the guys do the cooking while holding umbrellas but unfortunately I didn't take a photo of that. Becky as usual, was greedily munching on whatever rubbish snacks she could lay her hands on. So much for her low carb diet. Tsk tsk.
And here's a pic with Karlin. I always thought she had the most beautiful eyes in the whole of the Finance department.
Every farewell depresses me and reminds me that every time I make a friend here, I have to say goodbye soon after. The most devastating farewells were Lover Yen-yen's and Madam J's departures. I took such a long time to open up and finally bond with them and then they had to leave. Well, as Madam J puts it, home is where the heart is, so eventually all these friends I make will have to go home one day.
Ps: I have very limited photos of this event. Will have to get the rest from the other photographers before posting them up.
welcoming baby matthew lee
Baby Matthew Lee was born at 8.18am on 18 Feb to proud parents Andrew and YW. We girls paid them a visit at the hospital after work on Friday. Above you see Eliss' maternal instincts all fired up. Heh.
Baby Matt is a big baby. Weighing in at 3.9kg, he looks more like a month-old baby than a newborn. He has the darkest, glossiest and voluminous hair I've ever seen in a three-day old baby. Daddy Andrew also said he's got little muscular bulges on his shoulders and arms. Perfect gym material for personal trainer Daddy.
I am sure Baby Matt will grow up to be a handsome young man. We'll review again in 10 years' time.
pulau ubin
My housemate Becky happened to mention one day while we were at home in Sydney that a friend of hers (let's call her N) is doing research on the conservation of Pulau Ubin. Since I was born and bred on the island, Becky thought it a good idea for N to interview me. We were then introduced to each other on email a few weeks ago when I was having a short break in SG. After a few rounds of emails, we discovered to our pleasant surprise that N's parents and grandparents know my grandparents. They were neighbours who lived just 10min walk away and my Grandpa's elder brother even sold his house to N's grandparents many decades ago.
And so, we arranged a trip to Pulau Ubin for memory's sake. We arrived at the revamped, modern looking Changi Jetty early in the morning at 8+. I don't like the new outlook of the jetty. The look and feel of the bumboats and the jetty are a total mismatch.
I was very happy to see that the boats used to ferry passengers across to Pulau Ubin are still the same. I always thought they were going to be replaced by modern ferries like those used for transporting passengers to Sentosa Island and that many of the old bumboat uncles would be made redundant. My grandpa used to own one of these boats too ferrying people between the old Changi Jetty and Pulau Ubin. He has retired now and his boat was scrapped years ago.
The information kiosk is the first landmark you'll see after disembarking from the bumboat at Pulau Ubin Jetty. There seems to be more and more of these brick buildings sprouting up everywhere on the island. I miss seeing those traditional old wooden houses with zinc roofs around.
See the green bottle hanging on the wall next to the 2008 calendar in the first photo below? It's actually a syrup drink in animal shaped bottles and was one of my favourite drinks when I was little. I would always go for the purple-coloured one in the elephant-shaped bottle. Photo on the right shows the empty village square on the island. Sad to see it semi-desserted as it used to buzz with life everyday.
Here's a random semi-abandoned wooden about-to-totally-fall-apart bridge that had seen better days.
Here's looking through the backdoor of an old house that still exists on the island. I wonder how the occupants feel about the diminishing island community due to the government's plan to take over ownership of the whole island for development. Even the once famous 大伯公 temple is longer there.
At least the opera stage is still standing. It has been around in the centre of the village square since before I was born. I used to watch Chinese opera here when I was a kid. I am glad they didn't demolish it as it has great significance to the people of Ubin.
Here's how it looks when it's all done up for a performance. This photo is taken from the Pulau Ubin Stories blog started by N to document the news, development, stories old and new and anything related to Pulau Ubin. There was a Ubin Hungry Ghost Festival Wayang held here in August 2008.
Thanks to N's friend from Nparks, I managed to find my way to the plot of land my old house used to sit. There is nothing left there now. The land is overgrown with trees and is just another forest now. However, I recognise this abandoned well you see in the below pic. It was where we did our laundry outside the bathroom. The durian, mango and jackfruit trees still standing among the wilderness helped with the identification of the exact location where I once lived. It was a sad moment for me to see for myself that the old house has indeed been completely torn down.
I have a lot to say about the way the government handled the whole buy-over-land-from-villagers-for-development-but-changed-its-mind-after-chasing-villagers-off-the-island-cos-of-many-factors-and-hence-island-left-empty-for-supposedly-conservation-purposes fiasco. Thousands were uprooted and homes were destroyed, and for what? I don't buy all the bullshit about conservation because that was something that came about much later. There would have been no special requirement for conservation efforts if the islanders were left to lead their simple ways of life. We used to see many more exotic species of animal and plant wildlife way before the special Chek Jawa Wetlands project came about. People exclaim with delight now when they see a wild fowl or a wild boar on the island and attribute this to the environmentalists' efforts. But hey, do you know we used to see these wild things running everywhere way before the government stepped in to claim the island for whatever it was they wanted to do? What is the point of spending millions destroying something hoping to build something better only to regret and then spend more millions trying to restore it but find that some things can never go back to what they once were? Well, to be fair, maybe I didn't get the big picture. But then, who has been informed of the big picture and if there was any to begin with? I look forward to being enlightened. I was and still am greatly saddened to see the islanders' lives and heritage being manipulated as if they were merely another statistic.
scribbled by monkeycrab on Sunday, February 15, 2009 2 comments
topics: anecdotes, family, photowalks, places, reminiscence, thoughts
of valentines and flowers
I departed Singapore with a stalk of rose at 1050hrs and was received by two bouquets of flowers when I landed in Sydney at 2135hrs on Valentine's Day. Having spent the whole day in a cramped SQ economy class window seat with the aisle access blocked by two big Australian blokes and then arrived in Sydney to a cold 16 degree celsius night with a thunderstorm, I was rather depressed and trying very hard to fight the overwhelming homesickness that threatened to break me down. The flowers came totally unexpected and lifted my mood considerably, especially the cheery looking pale yellow gerberas.
combing hair can be so much fun
my SG itinerary centres around food (part 3 - final)
Read part 1 here and part 2 here. My final week of gluttony in Singapore as below.
This humble-looking Lau Di Fang stall at Kitchener Road is my all-time favourite place for some scissor-cut curry rice. I did not take any photos of the food because as all who've been there will know, all the curries, gravies and dishes slapped messily on top of one another in a plate don't make a very appetising picture. There are people who request for the dishes and curries to be served on separate plates or bowls so that they may look more palatable. But trust me, having all of them veges and meat and gravy and all in a clump of gooey mess brings out the full flavour of the meal. For me, I always have the cabbage dish, curry chicken wings, braised pork belly and egg with rice and lots of curry and whatever other gravies they serve, all on one plate please. Try it if you haven't. It's good. You just have to disregard the not too clean-looking surrounding.
One hot weekday noon, I met up with an ex colleague for lunch. It's funny how we never met for meals when we were working together in Sydney but got together in SG in my short visit back home. As colleagues, I would say we were merely acquaintances who never bothered to interact much except for the occasional obligatory small talk only when necessary. Corresponding with each other through Facebook after she'd left the company followed by spending a full day together just eating, shopping and chatting in familiar SG actually sparked the bloom of a friendship. We accidentally discovered the bargain set lunches offered at Azabu Sabo in Central at Clarke Quay and settled there for lunch. For $7.80, you could choose from a list of options a bowl of noodles (udon or ramen) and a bowl of rice, a drink for an additional $1 and a dessert for an additional $2 - that's just one of the many combination options to choose from.
The two of us shared two set meals that included a spicy tantan ramen, a salmon and roe rice, an omelette curry rice, two salads, a miso soup, iced lemon tea, coffee and ice cream for about $25. I liked the ramen most and found the salmon rice dish very interesting.
Here you see us doing the obligatory pose with the food. My face looks a bit swollen from all the eating over the past few weeks.
Our coffee and ice cream. This place serves a huge variety of ice cream desserts!
Did you know the first and only laksa steamboat place in SG opposite Vivo City belongs to my Uncle's wife's sister? I didn't and only just found out the week before I left SG. Of course I had to go try the food there. So I brought the angels there for dinner. Here you see one angel covering the other angel who was having a bad brow day.
We had the laksa and clear soup combination.
It's ala carte steamboat, not buffet style. We ordered all the different kinds of balls they have - fishballs, mushroom balls, sotong balls, meat balls and more, a lot of quails' eggs, some chicken, some veges, and a lot more. We over ordered and had to call my Bro for emergency help to finish up the leftovers. Total bill was about $49, split up to about $16++ per person. Not as expensive as I initially thought. Thanks Angels for the treat.
I went to the CBD for lunch with my Aunt one day. She treated me to a simple meal of roast duck, mixed vege and tofu and fried rice at Cha Kuan. It's located in a building opposite Hong Leong building (Sorry I don't know the name of the building). We had a good chat that day. My heart totally went out to her when she confided in me the problems she's facing both at home and at work. I feel really bad that I can't be around her to give her support.
Met up with the gals from my JC class one evening, thanks to Strawberry for organising it. I was told to pick a restaurant from the row of shophouses along Purvis Street and I chose this one because of the brightly coloured walls.
It's called First Thai at 23 Purvis Street.
I liked the interior a lot too.
Here's a group shot of the pretty girls. All of them turned up in chic business attire after work and I felt quite underdressed in my denim skirt and Mama's polo tee.
We had the olive rice (this was so good we ordered a second plate), thai fish cakes, tom yum soup, chicken wings, papaya salad, minced pork with chilli and basil (the chilli padi almost killed me), red ruby and mango with glutinous rice for dessert (which was disappointing both in presentation and in taste). Overall, the atmosphere and food were alright but the service was atrocious. More then twice, the service staff tried to shoo us away when we were not done with catching up. Conscious that there may be a queue waiting for a table, we did check but there was none. So we couldn't understand why they were so eager to get rid of us. I have never been made to feel so unwelcome at any eating establishments before. I never want to go back to this place again.
My second last dinner was at the Soup Restaurant in Paragon with Tudi and Rae. They serve very good double boiled soups. I passed on the herbal soups and chose to try the soup of the day that came in the set dinner we ordered - corn soup with pork ribs and carrots (very very very sweet!).
The set dinner also included their signature dish - the samsui chicken. I thought I would be able to have all the chicken skins to myself as both Tudi and Rae don't normally take the skin. But Rae gobbled up the skins greedily! Made me happy for nothing, tsk tsk. Anyways, I have always enjoyed the food at Soup Restaurant because they serve very simple dishes like those Mama would cook at home - they give you the very homey feeling. A big thank you to Tudi who picked up the tab for this meal.
Tudi, Rae and I proceeded to Bakerzin in Paragon for dessert immediately after dinner. We had the Chocolate Amer, Cookies and Cream Cheesecake (OMG YOU HAVE GOT TO TRY THIS. IT'S PURE HEAVEN), a Creme Brulee, hot chocolate shooter with vanilla ice cream and a rum and raisin ice cream.
Very sinful. Thanks to Rae (or was it Tudi? I was too distracted by the cakes to remember but I know for sure I didn't pay) for the heavenly desserts.
You know what? We didn't stop at Bakerzin. We took a train to Bishan, then a cab to Thomson to The Roti Prata House for round 3! That was for Vin who used to hound Tudi and I for supper at his favourite haunt. This time I treated the ladies to a plain prata, a plaster prata and teh alia. The pratas were quite disappointing, either the standards have dropped drastically or we were too full from the first two rounds to appreciate anything else. But I'm sure their briyani still taste as good as I saw many other tables of customers having that - yes they are quite known for their briyani! In case you are wondering, no there wasn't a round 4. We reached puking point and left the Roti Prata House.
My last dinner was at Springleaf Taiwanese Porridge Restaurant in Thomson. I had a bowl of porridge with sweet potatoes, some cold tofu with pork floss, cockles, omelette and preserved veges. I was told this place served better food than Oasis. As I hadn't eaten in Oasis in a long time, I can't really make a fair comparison. Surprisingly, I enjoyed the raw cockles the most (I rarely eat cockles!).
Sadly, this marks the end of my three-week food itinerary in Singapore. Weight check: I gained 2 kgs in that whole period of feasting. Not too bad at all. I was thinking more of a 5 kg gain. It's now time for some serious dieting and an intensive weight loss program in Sydney!
scribbled by monkeycrab on Friday, February 13, 2009 2 comments